Day 78: My Life is in Shambles

I actually remember saying this a lot last school year. Because my life was actually in shambles. Never, if you could live parts of your life over again, would I do what I did to myself: the last semester of college is supposed to be chill, college 'laxin'. Not 18 credits with a thesis, and ZERO days with a full night's sleep. Not even time for naps. ABSURD.
But, my reward was righteous, and I had the best summer ever.
However, now I'm over in Aberdeen and I have found myself in a whole new set of shambles.
Not overworked and overstressed about school or anything-- completely different. This time it is the realization that everything happens too fast. I REALLY REALLY REALLY mean it when I say that it feels like last Christmas break was only moments ago; all the pictures taken seem so fresh when I look at them now. This makes me sad about how fast time flies. A wise man at the restaurant a couple nights ago said, "Don't wish any time away, even the time you spend doing things you don't enjoy doing." Because he remarked on the hectic-ness of the night, and I agreed and said "at least on nights like this the time goes by faster." But as soon as his response was out of his mouth, I was agreeing. Wholeheartedly.
I've been here the better part of three months now and only have one more week of classes left, which means a third of my work is done. One more semester of classes, and then a semester of dissertation-writing. Those two periods will go by even faster than this first one has, for I'll have my placement, I'll be travelling, I'll be having people visit me, and it might even get warmer (fingers crossed). Then, before I know it, I'll be back in the US, hopefully starting a job reasonably soon after. I shant wish any time away ever again.And this brings me to the next part of my shambling realization.
All of my friends back home have either just finished their exams or they are about to begin them and in a week they will be heading home for Christmas break. This is my last chance for a Christmas break (and I'm doing it right, with a sibling Eurotrip). But there will never again be a month where my Virginia Beach friends all come back home and spend time roaming around together with no responsibilities, eating our parents' food and sleeping in our childhood beds. It won't be like that again. I have such warm feelings about these breaks. About VB. About those I care about most, still living in VB. And my heart is breaking to know that becoming an adult means forsaking certain awesome student perks.
There is no doubt I am happy to be out of undergrad, and less of a doubt that I will be happy to be out of postgrad come next September, but then what? It's not that I don't plan on doing something that gives me joy and an awesome life, I surely do, duh, who do you think I am (I'm Abi, checking one life dream off my list at a time). But, being a kid rocks. I'm ready to admit that being in college is still being a kid, and I'm simultaneously ready to admit that I'm not ready to stop enjoying that life.

Alas, that is life; it comes at you before you're ready, and you live anyways.