Day 158: Lyfe

Since the last time I wrote, Scotland has presented times where I thought the snow would never stop and my feet would never dry and also times where I thought the sun could not be brighter and warmer. It might just be foolish hopes, but in general it feels like Spring might be trying to peak her little face into the calendar. The days are getting substantially longer in what seems like leaps each day. (To all the folks that thought the darkness would bring me down, break my spirit, or affect my happy disposition, to you I say simply, Haters gon' hate. It did no such thing!)

I'm in full swing into the second and final semester of taught courses here at the Robert Gordon University, and feelin' fine about it. This semester is a bit more stressful in the sense that it is cramped because of the month-long placement in April that we must be finished with lessons before. And speaking of that placement, as of now there are two options before me. Either working in the Aberdeen City Archives, or working on a Special Collection project at the University of Aberdeen. We shall see what the Lord provides and where He calls me!

Otherwise, Life, as usual, is a crazy whirlwind of thoughts, ideas, plans, dreams, and songs.
I went to karaoke both Friday and Saturday of last weekend, both times being impromptu escapades, but well worth it. I wish I could get paid to be the party picker-upper, aka whenever there is a lull in enthusiasm or people shying from the microphone, they'd just throw me into the spotlight and I'd rally the people from their whiskey-fringed timidity.

5 days ago was my 5-month anniversary of being in Aberdeen, which basically means that Time has slipped the blind over my eyes and gone rampaging forward without my consent. That rascal. Now that I've been here for a substantial amount of time, my friendships have also become substantial, and, even as I write this, a wormy feeling is growing in my stomach about leaving them. It's an awesome blessing to be able to develop these international friendships, but it also means that little pieces of my heart will be scattered across the globe, living between different date lines, and waking to different pieces of sky each day, never reunited as a whole again. Except maybe at my wedding or something, but even then, you can't expect everyone from California to India to be able to attend.
On the topic of broken hearts, y'all....Gone With the Wind. What. wut. whuuuuuuu.
Finished that near 1,000 page saga yesterday, loving everyone moment of it, if by love I mean being torn into more and more pieces at so many moments. I suggest everyone read it, and don't think about the page number, because really I wasn't bored once, and would have read it much faster if it didn't have grad school and sleep as competition. I won't spoil anything really. I will just say RHETT--WHY. ASHLEY--UGH. MELLY--WHYY. SCARLETT-WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Song of the day: To Make Her Love Me- Rascal Flatts. (On shuffle on iTunes right now, and just let me say, I love when iTunes understands me so well, as it has been doing for the past half hour.)

Day 145: Who Would've Guessed

Who would have guessed I would be doing now what I'm doing now?
Aka, I've always "liked to cook," but in the past that meant, every month or so when I got an inkling or wanted to be a good daughter and help the mother. Now, with the root of the situation lying in necessity, I have developed a serious love for kitchen creation.
Baking is just really fun because of the often long processes and delicious end results, but I've also found a lot of enjoyment in all forms of cooking--experimenting and learning which flavor combinations work well together or figuring out new ways to cook the same ingredients to avoid death by boredom.
With this new passion, another has arisen hand-in-hand, and that is the joy of hosting. I love having ma friends over to eat and serving them fresh, homemade meals (today I had several friends over for brunch after mass, the beginning of a new tradition to stop contributing to the labor of those who have to work on Sundays, and I cooked up homemade buttermilk biscuits and sausage gravy and fried apples. Spot on) But also, I cherish the opportunities where I can come bearing tastebud-pleasing gifts for others who have graciously invited me to join their soirees and get-togethers.

I'm thankful I have had the opportunity to push myself in this seemingly insignificant way by the mere fact of living alone and having no meal provider in house or somewhere close, like the campus dining back at UMW. It has allowed me to be creative in a place where I am without paints and canvas, it has given me more confidence in my capability for independence, and it has begun to hone my skills for a Someday when I might possibly have a husband and kids to whom I must tend.

It doesn't hurt to have people fawning over me for a new reason either;)


Ha.

Tomorrow I think I'll make some cornbread and use up the buttermilk I have left from the biscuits, or else I'll never use it and it will continue to take up space and eventually go sour in my fridge. Keepin' this Southern thang goin'.

Speaking of the South: Gone With the Wind is blowing my mind no pun intended, and although 900+ pages will take longer to read than I would like with class time, coursework, and MY NEW JOB, I am thoroughly relishing every moment of Scarlett's insolence and, more importantly, RHETT'S prim perfection. (What a man; every time Margaret describes his broad muscles visibly contracting under his linen suits I can't help but imagine myself as the Southern Belle he's buying stylish, Parisian hats for--it's probably unhealthy to be so in love with a fictional character, but he's just SO (bad it's) GOOD.)
Also, if you didn't catch it, I have a new job working at the HMT restaurant, which is a 2-minute (or less) walk from my flat, annnnd it should be sweet. So thanks for your prayers! I start tomorrow:)

Day 133: Pride and Prejudice

So in the past 2 weeks I read Peter Pan and Pride and Prejudice, and while I would like to continue on the "P" title trend, I am headed to the library today with my sights on Gone With the Wind as a first choice or, if that's not in the stacks, another Austen.

I enjoyed Pride and Prejudice, mostly for the style of writing. I can't get enough of the language from that period. And since I have never seen the movie Pride and Prejudice either, I was kept in a bit of suspense as to how things would turn out, though it was no real surprise (*spoiler alert*) that the cold indifference of Darcy would melt away and that he, the best looking, most affluent man in the story, would end with Elizabeth, the voice of the novel and the cleverest girl. It had to happen. And I'm glad it did.

"Elizabeth's spirits soon rising to playfulness again, wanted Mr Darcy to account for his having ever fallen in love with her. 'How could you begin?' said she. 'What could set you off in the first place?'
'I cannot fix on the hour, or the spot, or the look, or the words, which laid the foundation. It is too long ago. I was in the middle before I know that I had begun.'
'My beauty you had early withstood, and as for my manners--my behaviour to you was at least always bordering on uncivil. Now be sincere; did you admire me for my impertinence?'
'For the liveliness of your mind, I did.'"

Oh, if all rich, handsome men fell for smart girls because of their brains..

To finish my thoughts on the book, I will say, I wasn't so infatuated that I can understand why so many girls are so consumed by it. Jane Eyre is much better, but maybe that's because I relate with the heroine more closely. Or maybe it's just because Jane Eyre is da bessssst. I would like to read other works by Austen, because her writing is quite good and these other stories might excite me more.



PS I start classes tomorrow--Woo, Boy!

Day 127: Business Time

So I quit my job at Thistle.
And tomorrow I shall go out to turn in my CV at a couple places around City Centre. So that an income will exist to keep me alive.
But today, I put up a bunch of t-shirt designs online, to spark/gauge interest among my friends. This is something I have wanted to start for a while; if people dig my designs, I can make some money from this venture. Which would be awesome.
Really I just love t-shirts. And I always wish someone would make shirts saying the things I want shirts to say, so I decided at last that I would have to be the one to make them.

Maybe I want this Wonder and Wander thing to become even bigger later on. But for now I'm counting on YOU, my fan base, to give me feedback and to buy my shirts!!!

 

Here's the link to the online shop: http://www.streetshirts.co.uk/wonderandwander
Spread the word, Please and Thank you! I couldn't do it without you.

Song of the day (now playing here, and I recommend everyone who doesn't know it to look it up and give it a play, and everyone who does know it, revisit it's glory): Why Can't This Be Love-Van Halen.

Day 121: A New Year?

Crazy.

I usually make unspoken, inconsequential New Year's resolutions. And I know I'm late this year, but I suppose you can make resolutions whenever, it's just that as humans we often need clear lines to operate within, so a new year marks a formal starting point for doing all those things we wanted to start in the old year. Anyways, mine are more like life resolutions, because, as you may have gathered, I've done a lot of thinking in my short time here in Scotland, and I'm taking advantage of using this year away from everyone/thing I knew to clear my head and evaluate my goals.

1. To be healthy and strong--exercise daily. I've done pretty well with running since in Aberdeen, but some days it's a brutal struggle against the lazy, novel-reading, couch monster inside of me. I have struggled with the idea of being strong since I first hurt my knee my freshman year of college. For a while I couldn't do much and all my lasting muscle from years of playing soccer deteriorated; I haven't been able to compete in any contact/team sports since, except a few regrettable forays (like that one time where I played soccer in the mud and rain and it was just so so fun to be doing again, until I twisted my knee and went down and then had to explain to those around that I'm not just a sissy who has to sit out after falling, but that things inside of me were falling apart). This lack of ability to play aggressive, competitive sports has been a cross on my shoulders at many times, because up until my 18th year, that was such a part of my life and identity. However, riding a bike across the country kinda helped me to realize that I can still be strong. So I don't want to lose that feeling now, even if I have already lost a lot of the muscle that I found myself with on the coast of Oregon. 

2. To live simply--give more and "need" less. I've already mentioned my desire for simplicity several times, as initially instigated by my traversing from one coast to the next with only what I could carry in two saddle bags. I came to Scotland with three huge suitcases and two large carry-ons. I probably didn't need it all; however, I don't want to do a trip with so much luggage again, so before I leave Scotland, much of what I own will be purged. I set a limit on myself near the beginning of my Scottish stay saying that I would not buy any clothing for myself, and I've stuck to that. I plan on continuing this. But in general, I want to continue to detach myself from the mentality of materialism that pervades our global culture in ways I don't even think about most times. I don't want to covet people's things. I have more than enough, and I have been blessed with a gracious family and great friends, who have provided me with everything I could need. I don't want to be addicted to the way I look, the way I dress, the technologies I own, or anything like that. 

3. To eat well and eat happy--choose foods wisely and cook more creatively. I do, beginning in this new year, want to pay more attention to what I eat, so that I can develop a healthier lifestyle, however, I don't ever want to be someone who rules out bread or rules out everything sweet or rules out meat or rules out all those other things different diets tell you to abandon. Because, honestly, food gives me one of the greatest joys, and without the so-called "unnecessary" food groups, so much greatness is lost. Eat in moderation, sure, but what is life if you can't enjoy a cupcake or bowl of ice cream without stressing over guilt? In this light, I want to start to expand my cooking/baking horizons. I've been cooking a lot for myself here, since that's the primary way I will be able to eat, and I've learned a lot, but I want to push myself to experiment and learn more, so that one day I can be as good as the mama who fed me for so many years.

4. To embrace the greatness of Life--pray more, read more, sing more, love more, see more. I want to make my relationship with God the highest priority. I want to start checking off more from my list of Books to Read. I want to learn and experience new things everyday through the stories and people around me. I want to take advantage of the rest of this year I have in Europe and do what I always long to do--travel. And I don't want to stop travelling once I go back to America to live; I want to write it into my lifestyle, even if it can't mean large trips across oceans riding on camel's backs or speaking in foreign tongues every time. Little adventures and journeys can be grand.

2013 is a starting point for me to understand that soon I will be a woman in the world, and I want to greet the world with a strength in body, mind, and soul. Confident in myself, my faith, my God, and His plans. I want to appreciate the things that matter and not worry about those that don't. I want to live fully and understand that I only get a shot at today once. 

Day 117: Do You Hear the People Sing?

As many of you know, I saw Les Mis at the movie theatre yesterday. I had been waiting in bated breath, since I first heard there would be a movie and Hugh Jackman was to play Valjean, which was sometime in the first semester of last school year. Of course, it came out later in the UK, so I had to wait a bit longer than some of my friends, but it was all worth it. 
Every time I listen to the soundtrack of Les Miserables or watch some sort of production, I get something new out of it. This film viewing was no exception. As I was watching and thinking about the horror of this time of revolution in France and what it would be like to live there and then, I started thinking about the idea of revolution in general.
Even deeper context was added to my musings by the fact that I am in Scotland, part of Great Britain. And since yesterday, I've given some thought to Great Britain's history, and the lack of any people-led revolutions since the mid 17th century. Whereas, America and every other state in Europe have gone through revolution within the 18th and 19th centuries. 
My initial thought and opinion was that Great Britain just really doesn't have much of a revolutionary culture. It's maybe lacking that fiery spirit and passion for liberty necessary to lead a revolt against government in order to gain the desired rights and freedoms. Maybe it's because the British government has just been so powerful for so long that it has had an easier time of extinguishing the sparks of radicalism before they've been able to grow into the flames of Revolution. Maybe it's a combination. 
Either way, I think this history has a lot to do with the current culture of the country. I think it has affected how the government functions and how the people think. For instance, America formed itself from meager colonies, seemingly dependent on the British government and trade, but as soon as we felt this government was not acting for the people, we rose up and transformed a piece of profitable territory into the most powerful and influential country the world had ever seen. America will more than likely never experience a revolution again, but that fire lies inside us as a People, even today. We, Americans, do not give our government much space without criticism; we don't like to see injustice, and if we feel that our rights are being infringed upon, we get testy immediately. And righteously so, we fought for what we have: the most free country in the world. Take up argument with that title all you'd like, but it is the truth. Our constitution lays it out so beautifully.
Anyways, Britain doesn't have that. Their government has pretty much always been there to guide, to provide order, to subdue riots, to tax. Even the Glorious Revolution was Parliamentary action, and all it did was put a new, more just, monarch into power. Heck, there's still a monarch today. Even if the Queen is mostly just a figurehead, she's still there. This lack of the "revolutionary culture" seems evident to me in an already discussed matter, too, that of CCTV. The UK has more video surveillance throughout it's country than any other in the world, and the citizens are fine with this; they have  been historically nurtured to deal with a government which is ready and willing to keep watch and "deal with" any suspicious or threatening acts. In earlier times, this consisted of quelling steps to revolution; now, maybe it's just to prevent crime. But I can't really see such an extent of surveillance being put up purely for the "public good." Where the government can see, the government can intervene. And where the government can intervene, the government has power over the people. And here, that's pretty much everywhere. 
I've had many a conversation with people here, Brits and other foreigners alike, that make claims to the mediated, British personality. They say that people here aren't so willing to speak out or stick their head on the line. People are more reserved. People censor their emotion and their passions, especially when in groups, or with people whom they aren't familiar. I am beginning to attest this personality trait to a Revolution-less culture. The passion, the zeal, the willingness to speak boldly about your views and ideas is not so strong; there must be a deeper reason for this. And I don't mean this only in reference to issues of politics or government or things of this nature. It permeates into everyday life.
I believe the cultures formed by a history of revolution, of struggle to create something better from something worse, or maybe something non-existent, instills a certain, je ne sais quoi, within the people. A realness, a sorrowful beauty. And this mark within a people eventually creates a richer, fuller view of life. It affects the ideas on how we should live, how we should hold on to what we have, how we should love. It gives deeper meaning to existence when you know it has been suffered for. Laugh when you can laugh, cry when you must cry, fight when you should fight, for times are always changing, but you must maintain purity, goodness, and truth within yourself, your family, your community, and it must be understood that a government, an individual, or anyone or anything, can not be allowed to lessen who we are, who we were created to be. Like the students at the barricade who were willing to fight and die even in a moment of imminent failure, sometimes we must fight for our principles no matter the foreseen results. 

Do you hear the people sing?
Singing a song of angry men?
It is the music of a people who will not be slaves again!
When the beating of your heart echoes the beating of the drums,
There is a life about to start when tomorrow comes!


Take that, swish it around, and either swallow it or spit it back out.

Just my inner philosophies.

Day 112: Things I Miss

A panorama of the Venice coast. My phone was changing its focus as the different light levels changed as I panned. The life of an iPhone photographer.

Ehem,

Things I miss:
Willing, late-night study buddies
My best friends
Long summer nights where it's warm even in the darkness
Swimming in the ocean
My tan
My Knockarounds (Haswell, Colorado may still be the new wearer of those beauts)
Riding my bike
Having a dog
Art History classes
The time of no responsibility, as I wait for my turn to jump into the world of even greater responsibility.